Sample Essay 14

People are less fit and active nowadays than in the past. What are the reasons for this? What measures can be taken to fix this?

Staying utmost fit is the target of every individual, however, not many are able to achieve it. In the current scenario many people are unhealthy in comparison to the older generation. In this essay, I will be discussing about the causes of this and the steps which could be implemented to have a healthy lifestyle.




The ease availability of junk food and reduced activities are major reason on many living an unhealthy lifestyle. An easy access to having junk food has increased radically for many, which not only temptes an individual to eat but also make him unhealthy. McDonalds, the king of quick bites has quadrapled its presence in India in last decade. Above this, an individual’s activeness has deteroiated completely with comfortable transportation access. Earlier, an individual used to walk atleast 25 minutes a day to commute to work, but now this has reduced to around a couple of minutes. This has weakned many people’s immune system, hence, less fit when compared to their prior generation. However, this can be resolved if people undergo a change.

A person choses what kind of health he would prefer. If people develop eating awareness this can dramatically change their health. Developing disciplinary eating habits, such as a balanced diet, can help an individual to be his/her best version and live a healthly life. Regular health checks can keep a lot of diseases at bay. Although, many find it difficult to take out time and do regular exercise, a routine health checkup can help people understand reasons on lack of health. This way people could build a strong health lifestyle for them and be fit.

In conclusion, access to comfort and food would continue to increase going forward, however, building discipline in a normal course could work wonders on a human life. I believe having awareness on what a person eats and giving a visit to health could eradicate the health differences between current generation and older generation.




Feedback :-

  1. ‘fit is the target’ – it is not the target as not one chooses the target, it is a necessity
  2. ‘ease’ – easy not ease
  3. ‘reason’ – reasons since you have mentioned two things and written are
  4. ‘temptes’ – tempts
  5. ‘make’ – makes
  6. ‘quadrapled’ – quadrupled
  7. ‘deteroiated’ – deteriorated
  8. ‘atleast’ – at least
  9. ‘weakned’ – weakened
  10. ‘choses’ – chooses
  11. ‘healthly’ – healthy
  12. ‘awareness´ – repetition, instead use the phrase take cognizance of
  13. Your essay is full of spelling and grammatical errors. Also, you need to work on vocabulary which is very basic

Band score – 5.5

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